So i turned 40 last year. I did not have any issues with it (because only old people have issues with aging :P).
Tapi saya terpikir balik di waktu usia saya mencecah 30-an dulu. Saya macam terpikir “OK Aishah .you are 30, it is when people become…old!”.. Ditambah lagi masa tu jodoh pun belum kunjung tiba. Clock is ticking bagai haha..insecure la sangat.
Tapi bila tiba di usia 40, rasa macam..hmm takde benda pun.
really the way you see things are different. i appreciate the different things I have gone through in my life. sometimes during conversation with new friends, when i started to tell them about what i did 20 years ago (i was already working), they will ask ” how old are you then?”
at this juncture i feel that age does not matter. what matters is how you plan to live in the now, and in the future regardless of your past. agitchuu deep bagai..
at 40, dah takde jeritan clock is ticking macam masa 20’s and 30’s. we have our own timeline. so bila ada rakan sebaya cakap ” aku dah takde benda dah nak achieve in life..semua untuk anak- anak”..i feel maybe dia dah capai cita- cita dia semua, aku pula baru nak nampak that I can be this and I can be that, and that would hopefully inspire my kids growing up.
Nabi Muhammad mula jadi Rasul umur 40, so it is a turnaround age. when you are wise and attractive in your own ways.
and I realized physically you might not appear old yet although that fine lines tepi mata mula nampak, rambut pun dah ada sehelai dua yg putih, yg paling ketara, mata dah mula kabur jarak dekat (this one I am still spared but I know it is coming very soon)..and this is when you are really picky about your food, as to not accelerate the aging process 😛
I feel a little more empowered at 40, especially I have bigger kids and I could talk more humanly things with them as opposed to changing diapers and wiping drools in my 30’s. We share favorite songs and discuss worldly issues although sometimes its hilarious to look at certain things from a pre-schoolers’ perspective.
anyways its also the time to let go things that you are always in control. the worries that I have from someone say things about me used to make me have sleepless nights when i was in my 20-s, its long gone now. Also you are clearer about your priorities in life. at this age, you question whether you need to really spend your time for something that is not meaningful to you, when you could fake it throughout your 20’s.
And the best is you are the truest, most genuine self at this age. You don’t feel there is a need to be ashamed by silly mistakes, embarrassments, lack of knowledge or intelligence, lack of money, feeling of a bad parent or a bad spouse. all of this is nothing and is human after all. you even pity people who brags a lot because you know all of us have shares of struggles and highs and lows to make us who we are today.
people around me of the same age also started to deal with health issues. the 3-diabetic, blood pressure, high cholesterol. and you discover there is a supplement for everything- aging skin, heart, eyes, bones. i have been hoping that the supplements I am taking is helping with aging process, as much as lowering the risk of aging diseases.
so I am turning 41 this month, and I am slowly embracing the fact that life is so much more beautiful when you take it easy, have faith in Allah and don’t sweat the small stuff.Â
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